L'indécence de mes pauvres états d'âme m'invite à relativiser. A me taire et à sourire. Je n'ai pas les mots, pas la moindre idée du comportement à adopter. Je ne comprends pas la moitié de cette situation. Je ressens la douleur, les doutes. Je souffre des mêmes maux, mais j'y réagis totalement différemment. Pour le moment. Qui sait pour combien de temps. Il suffit de peu de choses.

Je n'en ai pas moins de la peine.

B.O. : Never There + Cake.

+ + + + +

"Everybody here wants you" de Jeff Buckley est simplement la chanson la plus sexy du monde. Elle me file des frissons et des envies indescriptibles à chaque écoute. Ce soir, je l'écoute en boucle.

I sit here in my room...the only place where I can take off my mask and reveal even if only to myself my inner torment. I don't know how to explain the darkness that follows me every minute of everyday waiting for me to finally give up and let it consume me. Is it that I am ungrateful for what I have? Too be honest I am not sure all I know is that I feel like my life should be more than it is. I should be more than I am. This world should be more than it is.

I have this dream for my life, it is a dream I don't dare to say out loud because it is such a beautiful dream I cannot imagine how it will ever come true. I hold it close to my heart, wishing against all hope that life will be kind to me and I will wake up one day and find that my dream came true.

I don't know why I am tormented by my inner demons but they persist and I have not learned how to escape form them. They are my constant companion. They are Doubt, Fear, and Sabotage.

Doubt, I doubt myself all the time. I doubt my capabilities, my life, my future, myself. I am filled with self-doubt of who I am and who I will become. My path is unclear to me and it terrifies me to look into the darkness and see no light to guide my way.

Fear, that should be my middle name. I don't know what is more scary not reaching my dreams or trying to reach them and failing. I think I am afraid to show the world my vulnerability because I don't want to be rejected for it. I don't want people to see the ugliness of my scarred soul. Living has always seemed to be overflowing with sadness and I feel like I am going to drown in it. No matter how I reach for the surface I continue to sink deeper and deeper towards the bottom. My breathing stops, my eyes close...and I ceased to exist.

Sabotage, in some ways I feel that this is my greatest conflict. Today I should have woken up, taken a shower, started studying, and been productive. I woke up, put on my music, and was anything but productive. Even though I knew what needed to be done I just could/would/did not do it. Why? I am not sure? I do not feel motivated whatsoever to so anything especially since the material is boring. Is this senioritious? No, I feel it is more than that. I feel like I have lost myself, my will, my determination, my enthusiasm, my strength, my ambition, my eagerness. I have lost all of those things and I don't even know why or how. Most of all I don't know how to get them back.

I hate myself for that. For my weakness, for my lack of perseverance. I look at the hard work of my family and then I look at myself in disgust for the person I have become. For the person I am not. I want to shout at the top of my lungs.

"Don't you see me, don't you see this. Why won't you help me? Why won't you love me? Why won't you understand me? Can I lean upon you? Will you help me learn how to live again? Will you listen to my story and hold me? Will you share your warmth and take away my coldness? Please, won't someone see me. I need someone I can trust with all of me...my fading beauty and my inner ugliness. Where are you...my friend."

Why is it I always fall pray to these melancholy moments? Why can't I just have it figured out and not be unraveling?

I guess the simple answer to that complicated question is Life.

Get Smarter - the Brain Waves: Research has shown that music with a strong beat can stimulate brainwaves to resonate in sync with the beat, with faster beats bringing sharper concentration and more alert thinking, and a slower tempo promoting a calm, meditative state. Also, research has found that the change in brainwave activity levels that music can bring can also enable the brain to shift speeds more easily on its own as needed, which means that music can bring lasting benefits to your state of mind, even after you've stopped listening.

Apparently, the human brain works very much like musical note patterns. Whether or not the style and depth of the music plays a role has yet to be determined. All we know is that the thought patterns that arise while creating music help increase language learning, math skills and social skills -- among others.

Less Stress - Breathing and Heart Rate: With alterations in brainwaves comes changes in other bodily functions. Those governed by the autonomic nervous system, such as breathing and heart rate can also be altered by the changes music can bring. This can mean slower breathing, slower heart rate, and an activation of the relaxation response, among other things. This is why music and music therapy can help counteract or prevent the damaging effects of chronic stress, greatly promoting not only relaxation, but health.

Natural Prozac - State of Mind: Music can also be used to bring a more positive state of mind, helping to keep depression and anxiety at bay. This can help prevent the stress response from wreaking havoc on the body, and can help keep creativity and optimism levels higher, bringing many other benefits.

Hand-Eye-Coordination: It has also been documented that music can improve motor skills. An experiment conducted on a handful of elementary students proved that children learning basic motor skills such as throwing, catching and jumping while listening to music did better than those who practiced the same exercises with no music.

Actively Supporting Your Favorite Band: It's also been suggested that actively supporting your favorite band or artists has a similar effect to volunteering or supporting a cause. The more you support, the better you feel. So go ahead and vote up or down your favorite musicians:

• http://www.webrankingspro.org/

And check out the current artist/bands leader board:

• http://www.webrankingspro.org/artistsbands-leaderboard/

E was suppose to be at death’s door less than two / three weeks ago and now once again she’s running around after her sister who has gone from being told she can come when invited to landing on E’s doorstep daily again for several hours a day.

I am not sure how much longer I can keep up this pretence that I want to stay friends anymore.

On top of feeling like this over E, I am exhausted again and back to feeling as tired as I was in May and June. The upside is I sleep at night when I go to bed but the downside is I wake up feeling like I want to continue to sleep.

Studies show that despite rises in standards of living in the last generation, we are not necessarily any happier and more media time has been devoted to the concept of happiness over recent weeks with a good example by BBC political reporter, Brian Wheeler who suggests that now might a be a good time for our politicians to focus on our general well being.

There are many things that we think will make us happier and most of these will cost money and more importantly require us to take on debt to buy them. Debt is something we are told is almost unavoidable once we become adults, from the point we go to university to our first car or that expensive long haul holiday. A quick phone call and the quote of a 16 digit number on a plastic card and we have that new opportunity to improve our mood.

What if we tried to think differently about what makes us happy? What are the simple changes we can make to recognise where we are already happy and also where we can do things that are within our grasp and do not require us to build our mountain of debt. Research by Nattavudh Powdthavee suggests that our communities and friendships can be measured financially and contribute hugely towards our mood and confidence. Going from seeing friends and relatives once or twice a week to seeing them more often can be worth an additional £15,500 per annum. Dr Powdthavee points out that this impact on mood suggests the need for government policies to encourage greater social interaction. The modern drive to work longer hours and to travel further to do so is contrary to the assertion that we need only make more time to spend with loved ones or to make new quality relationships to increase our fulfillment in life.

As we know, work life balance is not easy to achieve, however, small changes in what we do during our week such as making time for a coffee with a friend, or watching a film on T.V. with a loved one can contribute in a gradual way to shifting mood and demonstrating the way to keep improving our happiness.

Morgen, ääh HEUTE! Kein Wecker, keine Termine, kein gar nichts....!

Ausschlafen bis der Arzt kommt :)

Und irgendwann am zum Abend hin wird D. mich anrufen, da werde ich mich den ganzen Tag drauf freuen!

Buona notte, Japhy

Ach ja: Ich war bei 7, war schwach (war aber okay) und wenn ich morgen, also heute, dabei bleibe ist es (trotzdem) acht!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One More Time is my current motto and Daft Punk's song is the theme tune to my life as it stands right now. There are so many things I want to do before moving my life to the other side of the world that it seems as though there's only enough time to do them One More Time. Some things I need to do for the first time - I wrote a list of places I wanted to go with Kiwi when we first met, both to show him the places I already fell in love with in the North East, (Angel of the North, Saltwell Park, Tyneside Cinema - in Gateshead Town Hall, Jesmond Dene and the old fashioned sweet shop on Heaton Road) and places we could experience together for the first time (Holy Island, Lindisfarne, Bamburgh Castle, Derwent Park and all number of places around Northumberland, Tyne & Wear and County Durham).

Unfortunately I've still not got round to ticking off the list of places I've never been. Somewhere between having no car, no money and my uni course taking up all my spare time, the idea of day trips fell on the back burner. But since I deferred my last course module until next year (to be done as remote learning from New Zealand), I have 10 weekends left in which to do something about it.

Getting back to the point though, top of my list are the things I need to do One More Time. The things I have done before that mean alot to me and carry good memories.  The lowdown of that list, sadly enough, starts with a trip to Blu Bambu for a night on the tiles (after an hour or two in Mood to get those dancing shoes fully lubed). A trip to Theatre Royal for the pantomime is a definite, as I took Kiwi to see his first panto there last year. A trip to The Salsa Club - you don't actually do any Salsa there, it's just a cosy little place for a drink and a bite where I've spent a few evenings both with good friends and with Kiwi when we first met. A few drinks in Tokyo is a must as it's where I met Kiwi and another couple in Hoko10, which is where we moved on to afterwards and spent the evening immersed in each other. A picnic in Jesmond Dene with sandwiches from Dene's Deli - try a ciabatta with tikka chicken, hot mango chutney, raita and full salad (plenty of onions), it's simply IMMENSE. A night dancing in World Headquarters, where I once spent a night with Kiwi and between him and the sweet sounds of Lionel Richie, it was like there was nobody else in the room.

These activities all have a running theme of Kiwi in them, but I feel it's important to reinforce the history we already have together here, before I enter his territory, the place where he had a whole other life before me and it'll be almost like a new relationship for us. It'll be amazing though, I feel there's another side to Kiwi that I have only seen briefly, when I have been out with him and our other Kiwi friends (mutual friends who introduced us), he doesn't become a completely different person, but it's like there's a little fuse inside him which gets switched on and he becomes his complete 'self', as if he's a lightbulb that has a sudden surge of electricity and shines more brightly.

So, here's to 10 weeks of 'One More Time', before I leave Newcastle and embark on the next stage of my life and relationship with Kiwi.

Probably because most weekends are without aim and that leaves me feeling a bit lost.

I started the day with a lovely little freak out over something that happened over a month ago. I have this amazing ability to bring back something that bothered me a long time ago and then spend the next day stewing about it. It happens more often when I have the time to let my mind wander and dig into the archieves.

Are you too insecure and shy?

Are you depressed because you don’t have friends or any boyfriend or girlfriend?

This situation must change!

Are you an invalid? If you have your health and you are perfect, you have no obstacle to feel completely self-confident everywhere, and even if you have a physical problem, you can learn how to surpass the sadness that this condition provokes you.

You can feel always secure and have clarity of mind and speech.

You can be easily transformed into a wise man or woman and attract many admirers, independently of your appearance. What really counts is your character.

Your social success depends on your intelligence and sensitivity. So, care about developing your intelligence and becoming always more sensitive.

How can you do that?

Well, there are a thousand ways through which you can reach this goal.

The best one is through dream interpretation according to the scientific method, because this way you will overcome even the most serious personality disorders, if your problem is not so simple.

If you are a regular young person who is simply feeling insecure, I have prepared an e-book for you with basic guidance about how you can stop definitively being insecure and have for sure a girlfriend or boyfriend, many friends, and many admirers in your social environment, who will notice your extraordinary personality.

There are a few techniques you can follow and easily become immediately accepted by your group of friends and by everyone else in this world.

You’ll learn how to have a very elastic personality and have many friends from everywhere, with different personalities, ideals and behavior.

Your capacity to make everyone feel comfortable with you will bring you all these friends, because you’ll be open-minded.

Besides that you’ll learn many things that will give you superior knowledge and a great sense of humor!

This way, you’ll have all the tools you need in order to conquer the world!

Prevent Depression and Craziness through the scientific method of Dream Interpretation discovered by Carl Jung and simplified by Christina Sponias, a writer who continued Jung's research in the unknown region of the human psychic sphere.

Learn more at: http://www.scientificdreaminterpretation.com and

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Click below to download your copy of the Free e-book

Beating Depression and Craziness

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christina_Sponias

The new e-book

Stop Being Insecure – Confidence and Clarity

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The scientific reality explains the religious mystery of all the centuries, and the accurate translation of the meaning of our dreams reveals to us the existence of a wise and saintly unconscious mind in our own psyche, which tries to help us fight against the wild part of our conscience, sending us important dream messages.

The e-book “Dead People in Dreams” was created after my summer offer of free dream translation and psychotherapy, using the example of dreams from contributors, besides many of my own dreams, since they revealed to me the reason why many of my friends and relatives had to die while they were still young.

This is knowledge that can be acquired only through the scientific method of dream interpretation. However, we have already verified in many cases that all the information we receive in dreams is objective and real. Therefore we can trust the unconscious mind that produces our dreams.

Relating the knowledge given in dreams with various scientific discoveries in many different fields, which happened at the end of the last century, I could verify that the materialistic conception of this époque had many unexplained aspects.

I understood then that only by abandoning the materialistic mentality and accepting to give value to several metaphysic observations I would discover the unknown truth about the human nature and the meaning of life and death.

This decision was quite dangerous for many reasons, especially because I would have to face the atheistic mentality of the scientific world and of the hypocritical society of our time, which pretends to be religious while there is real faith neither in its spirit nor in its selfish behavior.

There is no real faith even inside the Church or inside the most supposed sensitive human hearts.

Man believes in the existence of God doubting it at the same time, while following the behavior pattern of Satan.

The astonishing scientific discoveries of the last century in the fields of biology and astronomy proved to the world that the human being is simply a descendent of primates and that the existence of many stages of transformation justifies the human evolution.

The unknown of space was approached and the moon stopped being romantic, after the first steps of man on this natural satellite of Earth.

Everything suddenly could be explained and understood. We had no need of the existence of any superior being. Everything could be scientifically justified through research that revealed to us the cause for the appearance of each observed phenomenon on our planet.

The human being felt that he himself was God!

However, the horrors of human life in a world governed by terrorism, violence and immorality provoked much damage to the spirit of humanity.

The well-explained phenomena at a certain point needed more explanations that could not be given, and many false conclusions stepped on the contradictory truth that could not agree with them.

Today, the answers found for all the questions that silently remained without answer, clearly reveal to the world that nothing could begin on Earth because our planet is too young, and nothing could be transformed here if it had not been prepared to evolve.

Therefore, we need indispensably to admit the existence of a superior brain that organized the functionalism of nature and prepared the programs of development of each organism, determining a priori their level of evolution and their limitations.

Only because the human being is an idiot, since the biggest part of his brain is still in a primitive stage, can he not accept the idea of being inferior to God, and only because he is so evil that he could be named Satan, he hates the idea of being religious, calm, pacific, and obey to the wise directions of the most developed existent human conscience, which reached sanctity and perfection, and is the only one that can save him from craziness and despair with its wisdom.   

Learn more at: http://www.scientificdreaminterpretation.com and

http://www.booksirecommend.com

Click below to download your copy of the Free e-book

Beating Depression and Craziness

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christina_Sponias

The new e-book Dead People in Dreams is ready!

Find it at http://www.booksirecommend.com

But in the moment that Colin took Lucy out before we left, I decided on a whim to print out my resume, customize a cover letter, and take them with me. A quick call had me speaking to a manager who didn't give her name. She asked me which department I wanted and told me whose attention I needed to address. And when I got the spelling right, the woman I spoke to, who was high-energy on the phone, said, "You got it, Pontiac!" I waited till I hung up the phone before busting out laughing. She'd instantly lifted my spirits with her bubblyness.

I brushed my hair into a polished ponytail, put on some mascara, dusted the apples of my cheeks to give me a rosy look, dabbed on some lip gloss, and threw on a nice v-neck sweater. But I couldn't resist my lucky hole-in-crotch jeans. No one would know! Smiling, I shimmied into them, put on a pair of nice leather shoes, and threw on my car coat. Lovely. I looked classic. All you could see of my jeans was from the knee down, a bit of flare in the leg (aside from the hole, they're nice!), and I figured, I was dropping off my resume at a place where mostly teens work and everyone is super casual. I'd be fine.

And Then...

No and then! You were expecting me to next say something like, I'd forgotten my coat in the car and everyone was staring at the obvious hole at the crotch, weren't you? Nope, this time I didn't frak anything up.

I was an image of fun, ideal for handing in my resume. The woman I'd spoken to before leaving and how I'd dressed had given me confidence and lifted my mood. The funny thing is, when I got off the phone with her, I had a picture of who I thought I'd just spoken to. There's always this chipper manager there, and I had a feeling she was the one, giving her own name on the phone. Seconds after I had dropped off the resume with another staff member (another case of "just give it to me, I can give it to her"), she breezed by, and instantly I knew she was the one I'd been speaking to, and to whom my cover letter was addressed. I just had a good feeling. And on our way out the store, I saw her picture hanging on the wall. Underneath was her name, and I felt weird. I thought. I have the job if I want it, I know it.

I'm not all about throwing my five-year university education out the window and applying for Shoppers Drug Mart, the YMCA, and Dewe's Independent Grocer. But I live in a small town, and am currently in a place where I can't afford to be so proud. So whatever, right. I need a full-time, regularly paying job right now, and if I can work close to home as well, and in a place where Colin and I actually have a great experience every time and even have a favourite cashier, what the hell. It's money we need. If I can kick some Giger-style ass, I can certainly work in a grocery store. Just please not in the meat department.

Now all I'm waiting for is an interview, and for Ms. Scott to say, "You got it, Pontiac!"

Are there technical terms for that part?  I suppose I could look it up.

I won't though, and I hope that doesn't disappoint anyone, but if you're online already you may as well google it since I'm feeling too lazy to do so.

I used to think that my mood rings turned purple, and it irriated me that they did because the little cards that came with them never included purple as part of the mood spectrum.  Although I think I found one (from a display in a store, I think) that said purple meant a creative mood.  Whatever that means.  But it's more likely that I just like to be more specific about my color spectrum than the makers of these cards.  What I would call a deep purple is probably what they would consider a dark blue.  Which purpe really is, it's just dark blue on the red side really.  If there were more red in the blue it would likely be closer to maroon.

Anyway, dark blue was included on all the cards, and it means very happy/content, at least as far as I recall.  Right now all the rings show dark blue (although the bands, I must insist, are more on the shade of purple, but lets move on.)  So this means one of many things.

One, that currently I'm very happy/content.  I can't really argue with that.  Excepting the times when I'm hysterical (usually over things that really aren't that bad) I'm usually in a mood that the rings would register as dark blue or very happy/content.  I personally, would likely have to classify it as delusional--I really should be more concerned over the non-state of my life right now, when I need to find a job, a roommate, and all my classes for next semester.

So the other explanation (by many, I meant two) is that I have a fairly high body temperature (or low, whichever mood rings are supposed to register).  Also, perhaps this indicates why I use so many parethesis to set off my parenthetical comments? But anyway, I also had a little card that was supposed to be a stress measure.  You held your thumb on it, and like mood rings, it changed color, but instead of your mood, it was supposed to measure the level of your stress...beware if it stayed black.  That meant you should have done your homework a long time ago, and now you're a total loss.  Anyway, I always registered as dark blue there too, which meant calm/relaxed.

Not that far off from very happy/content really. Again, either I'm in a good place most of the time (or delusional) or I'm doing well at keeping a consistant body temperature.

And really, as a side note relating to the differentation of very happy/contend.  That always confused me as a kid because contentment is much calmer emotion than very happy, or so I thought.  But really, now I have to say that true happiness is probably more like contentment that what I used to think, as most people think, of as 'happy'. What most people now call happiness could really better be called ecstasy (not to be confused with the drug) or joy.

How sad is it that such a wonderful word as "ecstasy," and it's meaning, had to be corrupted by people who can't use the chemicals they were born with to make them 'happy'.

I see things so simple and so straight forward but within the group and especially with the staff everything seems to have to be debated to such a point it becomes really pathetic, it’s like they want to wind you up! As an example yesterday there where three regular group members me included and one regular didn’t show and phoned someone to advise they where sick. It was no secret that they where going to ask last week for this Thursday off due to circumstances but because I possibly needed the day off and another member was on holiday they decided against asking.

It was lucky I decided to go because if I hadn’t then the group would have been cancelled. Now normally when someone does not turn up for whatever reason we give them a call in the morning break just to check they are okay, yesterday it took almost 15 minutes to debate whether we should call this person or not – sorry but I see little point in wasting time discussing this and all the other members thought the same but it was like the staff wouldn’t let up, when we thought we’d reached a decision one of them pipes up “Have we made a decision about this and I’m not happy with that” when WE are trying to move on to other issues on the agenda.

We’re religiously pumped about how important is it to keep to times for the business meeting agenda and we attempt to run things to an order, i.e. if it’s time to move on we do, however when it’s the staff who are not happy they TELL US to continue discussing it, yet at the same time they also often point out the time and are clock watching our time keeping all the time. It’s just one rule for them one for us and they seem to constantly bend them to suit there own needs and requirement.

I guess a lot of that doesn’t make sense to people who don’t really know how a Therapeutic Community works and at the moment my brain is not functioning to well to word it any different, sorry. I have to admit the issues about timekeeping did come up in the afternoon session and it turned into a rather heated debate, I kept my gob shut because I knew if I spoke I would find myself getting angry.

The day was fine, I just didn’t want to physical be there, I was tempted to go home at lunch time and make an excuse the builders where coming!

I keep debating in my head whether I really wish to continue with the group. I like being part of it and I’ve made new friends but I am not really sure if and or how I am actually going to benefit from being there, I feel everything I say is stupid and rather pointless. I guess I will discuss it further with the psychiatrist at the hospital when I have my appointment.

The new member who joined us yesterday is very nice, I find I have a lot in common with them even more ironic is we share the same psychiatrist! Considering they where new they certainly spoke out about some issues and got involved which was very welcome from everyone.

Finally the builders returned today and have been continuing with the bathroom adaptions. They have been here for around 7 hours today and the work is coming along nicely. They will be back on Monday for another day’s work.

I managed to nip out this morning to get my flu jab done at the surgery. I phoned to make an appointment and they offered me one this morning so I took it. I intend to make an appointment with my GP for Monday morning – if I can get one, to discuss increasing the Sertraline to 150mg because I am certain it’s not working at the current dose, I did attempt to make an appointment this morning for Monday but all the advanced appointments had gone. I don’t know why my mood is just on a constant rollercoaster but I am feeling more pissed off and depressed than I have in a while, I really thought the Sertraline was working but it seems to be having little effect.

I eat when I'm sad.

I eat when I'm fat.

I eat when I'm hungry (which usually starts when I'm 1 hour after meals.)

I eat when I'm not talking.

I eat when I'm bored.

Somehow I couldn't stop finding the time to stop. And it's been a rather hectic week for me in terms of taking photos and stuff. And here I'm blogging, trying to keep my mind away from the reality that is so glued in my head. Yet, I still have a shoot tomorrow and I have to be at the floating platform at 9:30am tomorrow when my boss is still dragging his time to pass me his camera. Sigh. Does he even think about his own men?

Oh, and the new shoe that I bought is as stated below.

Cool? Of course I got my ways to get it cheap. =). Then again, this shoe appeals to me not just by their design but also the quality of the shoe that makes people who perspire a lot so much more comfortable. By the way, it's a pair of shoe that is meant for sailing. That made me dream of getting a yacht - which is by far the furthest dream to realise.

And curious on what I ate?

This few days - not in order - is what I have gorged down since the fateful day.

- Century Egg Porridge
- Cottage Waffles Ice Cream
- Mee Goreng
- Murtabak
- Nasi Briyani
- Pig Organ Soup
- Roasted Duck, Char Siew and Roasted Pork
- Carbornara
- Grilled Chicken Rice with Satay
- Soft Boiled Egg
- Bread from the Bakery Downstairs
- Home cooked food
- Chicken Rice
- Grass Jelly dessert

Well, pretty unhealthy to gorge down things like this - But that's me.

I guess it takes a while for a wound to heal.

Last Wednesday, I was in the middle of a good conversation with my best friend while heading to a fast food for breakfast and suddenly I just stop talking. I can really tell that she got annoyed because she went on her way as if she doesn't have a company. I can't really blame her for leaving me behind after all if I were in her shoe I will do the same.

I know this is one aspect of my personality that I need to change. I am not sure where I got this attitude, some says that it's because I am the youngest of the family and other says that it's because I was born in the month of August. I've heard from a lot of people that those who were born in August are known to be moody. I don't actually believe in that one, anybody can be moody whether they were born in August or not.

I am not really proud that most of my friends and even my family describe me as moody. That's basically the first word that will come out from their mouth when being asked to describe me.

Nice, tight and tense game.  I got to standing in the 6th inning when Victorino got on base from Furcal's throwing error, then Utley's blast to right that tied the game.  Then Burrell hit the rocket to left and the Phils were ahead.  Great outing from Hamels, I'm grateful that Lidge pitched a stress free kind of 9th and there it is, a  3-2 victory and Phils up 1 game to none.

When I was young
I'd listen to the radio
Waitin' for my favorite songs
When they played I'd sing along
It made me smile.

Those were such happy times
And not so long ago
How I wondered where they'd gone
But they're back again
Just like a long lost friend
All the songs I loved so well.

Every Sha-la-la-la
Every Wo-o-wo-o
Still shines
Every shing-a-ling-a-ling
That they're startin' to sing's
So fine.

When they get to the part
Where he's breakin' her heart
It can really make me cry
Just like before
It's yesterday once more.

Lookin' back on how it was
In years gone by
And the good times that I had
Makes today seem rather sad
So much has changed.

It was songs of love that
I would sing to then
And I'd memorize each word
Those old melodies
Still sound so good to me
As they melt the years away.

Every Sha-la-la-la
Every Wo-o-wo-o
Still shines
Every shing-a-ling-a-ling
That they're startin' to sing's
So fine.

All my best memories
Come back clearly to me
Some can even make me cry.

Just like before
It's yesterday once more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is my first English song when I was studying in High school. The English teacher taught this song by singing each sentence by each sentence. Actually, I did not have any impressive feeling at that moment. However, time goes by fast, and it has been many years later; many things of my life has been changed. With getting more life experience of human emotions, suddenly I sometimes think of the past. Right now, every time while I am listening to this song, all those memories bring back to me. I know what had happened already happened. No matter what it was, and all I can do now is just keep going. This is how I tell myself.